Back to work: three practical ways to reacclimatise
It’s late August and one of my clients tells me, “I’ve just got back from holiday, and it’s crazy. My to-do list is massive. I wish I’d taken more time off.”
I bet this has happened to many of you too.
If you’re in the UK like me, you’ve spent half the year outside due to the pandemic, under grey skies and freak floods rather than golden sunshine or blue skies. And all this after 18 months of working from home during a pandemic, putting in longer hours than ever and seeing our personal and professional lives merge together. It's no surprise that so many of us feel exhausted and fed up.
And as someone who works with nonprofit organisations, I’m keenly aware of the levels of burnout that charities, in particular, are facing.
Most charity staff are feeling burnt out
Earlier this year, nine out of ten charity workers surveyed by Third Sector said they felt burnt out. Managers are noticing, too. Last year, Ecclesiastical’s Charity Risk Barometer showed 44% of charities surveyed were worried about losing staff due to burnout, and two thirds of charity workers said their stress has increased since the pandemic began.
Going through burnout can be frightening. But it is also a warning that we need to be kinder to ourselves and give ourselves time to think about what we, as individuals, want and need. Not what your organisation, your colleagues, your partner or children need. But what you want and need.
We’re rethinking our values
Time outside of the usual routines of commuting and office work has given many of us new insights into what we want. We’ve reassessed our priorities like never before.
In a wave that some are calling the Great Resignation, more and more of us are changing our employment status. A Microsoft survey of over 30,000 people around the world found that 41% of workers were thinking about quitting or changing jobs this year.
So what do you do if you find yourself asking “Why am I doing this role?” or “Is this really the right career for me?”
You don’t necessarily have to quit your job. Here’s what you could try instead:
Visualise where you want to be
Work matters. It takes up around a third of our lives, and it can be a vital source of meaning, fulfilment and learning. But if you feel like your job is taking up all of your time, energy and identity, it might be time to step back and think about your big picture goals.
Exercise: create a mind map
Take a piece of paper, and put a circle at the bottom. The circle is you, right now. Now ask yourself: Where do I want to be in the future? What do I want from my professional and personal life? What does that look like? Fill up the top of the page with bubbles describing your ambitions and aspirations. This can be anything, from going back to studies, taking a year off, staying where you are or re-training in a new field.
Look at what you’ve put down on paper. Do all the bubbles compel you equally, or are some of them not speaking to you? Seeing your wishes down on paper can help you filter out the real options from the ‘noise’ - the stuff we just say because we think we should, not because we believe we’ll ever actually do it.
Next, choose one of the options at the top. Go back to the circle at the bottom of the page which represents where you are now. What’s the first step you need to take that will get you on the journey towards that option? What’s the second step, third, fourth? Map out as much as you can. Remember that you don’t have to do it all in one go, you can always come back to it.
Then look at the next bubble. What’s the first step you can take from your position right now? Sometimes the first step is the same for a few outcomes. So even if you haven’t got the whole journey plotted out, you know that taking that first step is the thing to do.
Don’t assume you need to change job
It’s really easy to think that a life change has to mean a change of job, too. But sometimes we just need to shape our role so that it better fits our interests and aspirations. Here’s a simple exercise to help you do that.
Exercise: distinguish between organisation, role and sector
Take a piece of paper and divide it into four squares like this:
Bottom left is current role, current organisation; bottom right is current role, different organisation; top left is different role, current organisation; and top right is different role, different organisation.
Think about each quadrant in turn. Ask yourself questions like: If I am to stay in this role in the same organisation, what do I need? What would that ideal scenario look like? What would people around me be doing in that scenario? How would I feel?
Analyse your options for each quadrant in the same way. This helps you find out which one of the quadrants appeals to you the most. Choose the one that your gut is telling you is the best and start plotting the journey of getting there. Ask yourself what you can do tomorrow, next week, within a month that will help you get there.
And remember the job does not have to fulfil all our needs. There are hobbies and activities we can do outside work that do that.
Stop your inner saboteur from taking hold
How often do you start to get excited about a new idea, then find yourself imagining disaster ahead? Our inner saboteur is the voice that speaks up when we are dreaming big. It warns us that our plans are too bold, we are not clever enough, or it will never work out.
The saboteur is there to protect us from getting hurt. It’s our survival instinct kicking in. The issue with the saboteur is that it doesn’t realise that the protection we needed as kids is not the same protection we need when we grow up.
So we need to learn to manage our inner saboteur. Otherwise our lives can be marred by fear.
Exercise: name your fears
People are often unhappy about things at work but tolerate them out of fear that they will be fired.
This kind of worrying can erode our confidence, undermine our values and integrity. So it’s important to address them head-on. You ask yourself “What if?”
Start with the outcome you are worried about. For example: “If my boss doesn’t like me, they could fire me.” Then ask yourself: What if that happened? You might answer: “If my boss fired me, I wouldn’t have a job.” What next? “I would look for an advertised job.” What next? “If I don’t get one of those, I might ask friends and colleagues for recommendations.” What next? “If that didn’t work out, I might consider jobs that are different from my current one.” What next? “If I didn’t find another job, I could try working freelance.” What next? “If I didn’t find one, I could go back to the work I did when I was younger, like food service.” What next? “If that didn’t work out, I might need to borrow some money to pay my rent.” What next? “If I couldn’t do that, I might need to move in for a short while with a friend or relative.”
This exercise helps you realise what could realistically happen. Often the issue of not getting along with your boss is far from actually getting fired. So it’s helpful to get rid of your fear and be solutions-focussed.
What’s also important to remember is that you don't have to go through tough situations on your own. Always ask “who can help me in this situation?” There are always people and organisations who will be able to help.
Take small steps, starting now
When we’re feeling exhausted or overwhelmed, it’s natural to think that we need to make huge changes. A mass of options makes us even more overwhelmed and helpless.
The tools I’ve shared here are meant to help you separate the options your gut is telling you are real from those options which just seem relevant but aren’t. Once you get clarity on what’s really possible for you, you can start plotting the route of how to get there. It’s okay to use these tools and exercises over a period of time you don’t have to complete everything immediately.
So how do you dig down to this deeper level of understanding what’s important to you? You need to make time for it. Time to sit with what you’ve learnt. Block out time in your diary for this. Make it a practice. It’s good for you, I promise.
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P.S. Coaching can really help you find your work-life balance options. And, like this time every year, I’m ready to take one more paid and one free coaching client. So, if you’re interested, get in touch.